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Wet Socks

I wore some shoes that got waterlogged.  I took off the shoes and the socks when I came inside. My wife saw the wet socks and said they were disgusting.

Hey man, Jesus wore socks, I told her. With sandals? Was Jesus the type of guy to wear socks with sandals? Only when it was cold.

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Sold-out show

Somewhere, there’s a sold-out arena full of people jostling to tell me that I stink.  And the promoter skips town without paying me.

A kid’s parents take a break from screaming at each other just long enough to tell her, “Get a real job.”  And then they go back to banging pots and pans.